{Karlton Bontrager}

Karlton was with me last night (Saturday) as I was writing the update for Friday. When I turned around to see what he was up to, he had nodded off to sleep in his wheelchair, so I quit before I had time to send out the special thank yous to: Becci, Gil & Win, Helen, I.J., Morris, Lee, and Ted and Novina. Thank you everyone for your e-mails, cards, words of encouragement, prayers and positive thoughts. Karlton is certainly reaping the results of your love and good energies.

Karlton received a lovely massage late Friday afternoon. Although he said he still had some back pain during the night, the massage did wonders for him. When I arrived at ISIS on Saturday, I was told Karlton slept in until 9:30 a.m.!! The nurse said that since it was Saturday, there was no reason to wake him up and let him sleep in. His body must have been very relaxed and went into a healing mode.

It took Karlton a very long time to come out of the shower Saturday morning. When I asked him if everything was all right, he said that he washed, shampooed, and dried himself all on his own, and that’s why it took so long. He said he can’t dress himself completely on his own yet, but I was happy to hear that he is slowly but surely learning to take care of himself.

Saturday morning was a bit brisk but sunny, so Vailoa, a nurse’s aid, helped Karlton walk from his room, out the front door and down the parking lot to the side door! Then she pushed him in his wheelchair around the ISIS grounds. When we got back to the front door, he said he would walk again, so with help, he walked down the corridor to the dining room where he had his lunch with some of the other patients. Karlton doesn’t like to eat there because he can’t always tolerate the noise level, but yesterday he was able to stay and finish his lunch.

I had Karlton weighed yesterday afternoon. He had gone down to 64 kg when we got back to ISIS about two weeks ago, but yesterday he weighed 67.5 kg. Yeah!! All the food he gobbles down is doing some good finally!

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Wednesday, Karlton had an appointment with the radiology department at DPH (Dunedin Public Hospital) because he has been having pain in his left shoulder. It was the first time since the accident that he did not need to be transported by an ambulance. Instead he used the Mobility Taxi – a van that can transport wheelchairs. The X-rays did not take very much time but the surprise came when the accompanying nurse asked Karlton if there was any place he wanted to go. She said she would take him in his wheelchair but he didn’t have anywhere he really wanted to go so we went down George Street where all the stores are. We stopped at the Canterbury Sports Store and Karlton checked out helmets/head gear. They didn’t have a big selection but he seemed to be satisfied with what they showed him. After a few more stops, he said he was getting cold and hungry so they went on back to the hospital while I stopped in at McDonald’s to get him a snack – Fillet of Fish Sandwich/Fries and Apple Pie.

While we were on our jaunt, a couple of nurses from Ward 5B recognized Karlton and stopped and talked to him. They were amazed at how well he looked.

We did not get back to the ISIS center until way past 1:30. I was afraid our nurse would get in trouble since the appointment was at 11:00 but she said nothing was ever said. “Besides it’s good for Karlton to get away sometimes. He must be bored stiff sitting here all the time.” What wonderful and caring people we have met!

Karlton was still hungry so I went to get his lunch. Lo and behold! He had fish and chips for lunch and he gulped that down in no time. I must ask the nurses to weigh him to see if he has gained any weight since coming back from the hospital.

Karlton got the day off from the PTs so he was able to check his e-mail. Even though his left arm was in a sling and it rested on a pillow for support, Karlton complained about his shoulder. He also said his right eye socket was giving him pain so we did not stay at the computer for very long. He did have a session of back massage and he said that felt very good and relaxing.

Thursday morning Karlton saw Dr. Tie so he asked him about the X-rays. We looked at them together and he said that Karlton does have a subluxated (?) left shoulder but he does not have a dislocated one. The muscles have atrophied and cannot support his arm. The PT gave Karlton a better sling/support so I hope that will help ease the pain he feels.

During the PT session, Karlton stood on his own for nearly five minutes. The PTs were there in case he needed them but they did not have to hold him. Then he got a wee rest and again they had him stand and play checkers as he stood on his own – this time for ten minutes!!! He was also able to step back a few steps without any support. What an improvement he has made!! I thought he would be exhausted at the end of the session but the PTs said he had to walk on his own – just to the door. He did take at least ten steps on his own! After that he walked ALL the way back to his room holding the PTs hand.

I could hardly hold back my tears as I followed him with his wheelchair back to his room. It was so wonderful to see him “walk” with gusto!!

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Tuesday was a rainy day but much milder than Monday. When I arrived at ISIS Karlton was eating a peanut butter jelly sandwich that I had fixed for him the night before. Soon a nurse arrived with two bowls of oatmeal & fruit and soy milk. He gobbled down that quite fast and was ready for a big bowl of apricots I got for him. The amount of food this boy can eat is amazing and yet he doesn’t seem to put on any weight!

Karlton complained that he had terrible back muscle pain during the night and could not sleep until he got some medication. The PT explained to him that he had not used his muscles for so long that everything he does now will probably ache for a while. The PT had Karlton push the wheelchair with his leg to the physio room today. Under protest, he made his way there. Then the PTs had Karlton stand and balance himself for a wee bit longer than yesterday. He sat balanced on a table with his feet on the ground and had to hit a balloon with a badminton raquet. Soon the PTs raised the bed so his legs were dangling but he was able to maintain his balance and still swing the racquet. After the session was over, Karlton walked (with support) all the way down the corridor from the physio room. A great workout!!

Hooray! Today was PICC line removal day. The nurse warmed his arm for about ten minutes to let the veins expand. Karlton was told it would not hurt but was a bit hesitant so I told him not to watch as they pulled it out. I told him I would wait ten minutes and come back. He said he could feel his pulse as the nurse pulled the line out of his vein … 53 centimeters of it!! The nurse measured the line several times to make sure every centimeter of it had been removed. Karlton said it did not hurt but he could feel it coming out.

One more step towards normalcy in Karlton’s life! He was in good spirits, wide awake, alert and joking all day!! Thanks everyone for your e-mails, cards, prayers and good wishes.

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Monday was a very windy and stormy day. Down in the valley we had hail and sleet but as we crossed the green belt and onto ISIS, the ground was covered with snow. It snowed and stormed on and off all day but by the time I left around 6:45 p.m. all the slush was gone from the roads.

Karlton was able to answer 12/12 questions correctly three days in a row so now he is considered to be out of the PTA (Post Traumatic Amnesia) state. The OT told Karlton that he was permitted to leave the hospital premises so he asked me to take him to Aukland! He doesn’t ask for much, does he?

The PTs worked him pretty hard in the afternoon. They made him slide over across the bed. He had to stand a wee bit all by himself!! He was left/forced to/and able to “find his sitting balance”. Karlton’s a/c joint in his left shoulder has separated so needs to wear a sling and keep it supported at all times. After the session with the PTs, Karlton had to walk down the whole length of the corridor. And because he is able to sit up straight, he has a regular wheelchair now.

Karlton continues to make progress everyday. Thank you everyone for your support and encouragement.

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The shuttle service between the hospital downtown and ISIS does not run on weekends so I told Karlton I would take the earliest public bus that runs at 9:31 on Sundays. I thought I would surprise him by catching another line which left the Octogon at 9:10, arriving at ISIS at 9:35. When I arrived he said: “I thought you would be here at 8:00. Dad’s already called and I’ve already had my breakfast and my shower.” Oh, well!!

Yesterday was a rainy day and a lazy kind of day. Karlton mentioned that he likes the weekend because the physios don’t come bother him and he enjoys being lazy. He listened to his music and soon said he would like to check his e-mail if I would read it to him. It wasn’t long until he said he was very uncomfortable because he was supporting all his weight on two points on his bottom. How easily we forget that we can shift our weight, wiggle around in our seats and not even think much of it. So our session in the computer room didn’t last too long.

One of his favorite nurse’s aides was on duty and talked him into walking to the dining room. He was quick to agree and with our support he walked there and sat down in a chair. Soon it got too noisy for him so we took him back to his room.

After lunch, a couple of his friends came by and again he took a little “stroll” with them. They wanted to take him outside for a while but the weather was too cold and wet. I have to remind myself all the time how much energy it takes him to walk even a wee bit. Later as he was resting in his recliner he said he didn’t want to take a nap because he had a hard time going to sleep the previous night. I was just going to the kitchen to cook something for him so I had a nurse roll him in his very BIG recliner to be near me. I had to keep talking to him, clanking pots etc. to keep him awake. I guess the effort paid off because when Jennifer and Alec called him at 6:30, the nurses told them that he was fast asleep!!

Karlton is able to stay awake most of the day now. He is alert, witty, sarcastic, and is always telling me that my English is not very good and that I need to take classes to learn to communicate better!! I guess the old Karlton is slowly emerging!!

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Wow! I found a fairly decently-sized Asian store where they sell fresh tofu. Thanks to Dr. Stuart Tie, a Chinese house surgeon from Malaysia, I found out there are four Asian stores in Dunedin. Val, a wife of a patient at ISIS, and I got into Ted’s car (Ted is in charge of the kitchen at ISIS) and went looking for the store in South Dunedin. I got bean sprouts, bean vermicelli, and tofu to start off with. I will have to go back next week and get some red bean filled buns that Karlton said he would eat.

And yes, I did drive!! It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be driving on the left side of the road. I kept getting the windshield wipers going every time I tried to signal a turn but that was about the only mistake I made. Oh, and I didn’t speed or go through yellow lights. I just didn’t need to get stopped because I don’t have an international license with me.

And WOW! Karlton let me take him outside. I think it was because Farmer John said she would come with us. And when Farmer John says a walk would be good or just about anything else, Karlton usually listens. Sometimes a strong and loud person comes in handy!!!

In the afternoon Karlton asked me when “his” reflexologist was coming. When he found out he wasn’t going to get a session he asked me to massage his feet. It wasn’t quite as good or gentle as he would have liked, but he tolerated it o.k.

Karlton is starting to enjoy coming to the computer to check his e-mail and send a few messages. He still tires very easily and complains that his eyes hurt after a while, but he is showing much more interest in everything.

Hope you are enjoying the last of the summer season. We are beginning to see daffodils, canterbury bells and grape hyacinths popping up. Spring is almost upon us here in New Zealand and with the new season of renewal, our hopes and prayers are that Karlton will continue to improve at his record breaking speed!!

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Friday started as another beautiful day in Dunedin. Karlton would not let me take him out for a stroll saying that he did not think I was strong enough to control the wheelchair around the grounds of ISIS. He expressed a real concern for his life so I did not push the issue at that time. By early afternoon, the weather had turned cold and windy so the opportunity for a walk was gone.

One of his physios had been away for a week and was pleasantly surprized at the progress Karlton had made. Also, a nurse stopped me in the corridor and said, “I can’t believe how well he is walking. He is going to walk out of ISIS.” I am always gratified and grateful to hear remarks like these and encouraged at how well Karlton has progressed.

Karlton has nicknamed a nurse “Farmer John” because she has an organic farm and also because of her loud voice. She is quite patient with Karlton and tolerates his cynical comments and jokes. But more important, Farmer John sells organic, free roaming chicken eggs so I have found a great source of protein for Karlton. I was able to make egg foo young, salmon burgers, fried rice, etc. for K. since he has gotten quite fed up with hospital food.

I pan fried some VERY fresh sole fillets that Helen (the reflexologist) had so graciously brought for us … fresh off the boat … as these fish were swimming earlier in the day. Karlton really enjoyed the fish and was quite reluctant to give me my portion of the dinner. This was one great meal that Karlton and I thoroughly enjoyed.

I had planned to leave before dark but by the time Karlton was tucked in bed it was already dark outside and I had to run to catch the 7:45 bus. It was a busy day but Karlton really enjoyed the wonderful reflexology session he had, and was relaxed and content.

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Thursday was a beautiful and warm day in Dunedin. When I arrived at ISIS, Karlton was sitting in his recliner writing messages he wanted to send to some friends. He had already had his breakfast and the OT had taken him to have his shower. One of his first requests to me was to get him something good to eat. He had his “snack” of oatmeal, a big bowl of apricots and a peanut butter sandwich and he was ready to go to the computer and check his e-mail.

After Terry arrived we decided to take Karlton for a walk around the ISIS grounds. Karlton was decked out in his “flash” sunglasses (the ones he has on in the picture on the home page) and a baseball cap. He tolerated the sunlight well and since it was warm we took our time looking at the different flowers and plants and enjoyed the nice fresh air. Shortly after lunch, Karlton’s friends arrived and wanted to take him out in the warm air so off they went. Karlton came back wearing a chain of daisies around his neck … and no complaints or protest on his part!

By the time the PTs came to work with him he was pretty worn out from the walks in the fresh air but off he went to the physio room. They had him walk a wee bit. Then they had him put weight on his weak leg by having him reach for a balloon on that side above his head. He did this several times under protest but we could all tell how exhausted he was.

Karlton had a full day! The nurses were surprized when a pizza delivery man arrived at the ward later! Karlton and his visitor had decided they were hungry so had ordered it unbeknownst to all of us.

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Today is my last day in New Zealand. A number of people have asked if the website will continue. Yes, of course it will. I intend to call Karlton and Choy-Lang every day, and I will attempt to write updates on a regular basis. No doubt it will take us a week or so to develop a new rhythm for our communications. However, your very enthusiastic responses to the website have convinced me that it is important to continue.

As I prepare to say good-bye to Karlton, I cannot help but make comparisons with my first hello to him in New Zealand. Then he was lying unconscious in a hospital bed, hooked up to all kinds of machines and monitors, and his face had swollen to twice its normal size. Now he wakes up to full alertness, makes conversation, complains, cracks jokes, and plays pranks. Then I felt crushed when the neurosurgeon told his mother and me of having removed a portion of his brain the size of an orange. Now I am increasingly amazed as he speaks in three languages and makes us aware that more and more of his memory has returned. Then I worried about whether he could breathe independently. Now I worry about setting up a network of resources and supports in the United States so that he can continue his rehabilitation and recovery without interruption.

There are some questions that I will probably never have answered. At what point, for instance, did he realize that it was not usual for both his parents to be at his side–that he was an ocean away from home, but his parents were there too? Was there an actual fall that triggered the return from ISIS to the hospital, or was that merely a hallucination? And did the stand-off with the nurses and the doctors on that Sunday night have a direct payoff? In the short term, they won because we gave in to their procedures. But in the long run, we won because the nurses left him alone throughout that night, the in-dwelling PICC line replaced the daily drawing of blood and cutting of vein lines, and his antibiotics have been switched to oral administration.

The most gratifying thing for me has been the bond that has grown between Karlton and me during this time. He now acknowledges openly the difficulties he had with me in the past, but he is able to look beyond them and enjoy our present relationship. That for me is a tremendous reward.

And so I return to my wonderful Louis who has worked valiantly to keep life somewhat normal in Rhode Island. And I return to the real world of employment. In the past, I have wanted to hold onto summer a little longer, postponing the beginning of the academic year. But this summer has not been one I want to prolong. Instead, I embrace the very near future when Karlton returns home and continues his rehabilitation Stateside.

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Karlton can walk! I saw it with my own eyes! He can walk!

Monday afternoon only two PTs worked with Karlton in therapy. They stood on each side of him, helping him maintain balance by holding onto a belt around his middle. He lifted his pelvis so his left leg could swing forward. The L-shaped brace in his shoe and tied around his leg kept his ankle flexed so that he did not trip over his foot. And then he leaned forward and supported his weight with the left leg while he stepped forward with the right.

Like the arm-raising ‘parlour trick,’ Karlton downplays this new advance as more smoke and mirrors than true miracle. He’s not actually walking, he says, he’s just lifting his pelvis. But the PTs indicate that his leg muscles are indeed doing more, and I think I can see his knee bend each time he raises his leg. In the therapy gym he must have walked at least 10 yards, rested, and walked back again with a PT on each arm.

When he walked, Karlton had difficulty placing the left foot. Sometimes it landed in front of his right foot. Other times it fell with the toes pointed too far out. The PTs guided him verbally, and he made the adjustments they suggested.

Meanwhile, email is becoming ever more important to him. Besides having only one hand for the keyboard and the mouse, Karlton has difficulty reading the email messages he receives. He doesn’t track well from the end of one line to the beginning of the next. At the moment, he has to settle for having messages read to him and writing on paper for later transcription. And write he does. Monday when I arrived at ISIS, he had already written two letters to be sent out. By the end of the day, he had written another one, and he dictated a fourth. I have difficulty reading his writing. Just as when he was in ICU, his writing is most legible at the top of the page; it becomes smaller and more crowded at the bottom. When he flips the page in the clipboard, he continues to write but sometimes at different angles. Later, when I go back over with him what he has put down, even he can’t quite figure it all out. So we do the best we can.

What a day this has been! Can we ever thank you too much or too often for your prayers and for the positive energies you send our way? We are so grateful.

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